Wednesday, March 18, 2009

10 ways to creep out a roommate

Okay, I stole these off of my sisters page on Facebook. I thought they were absolutely hilarious.

10) Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, ''He just didn't belong.''

9) Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.

8) Draw a tiny black line on your nose. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, ''The hair, it's growing. Growing!''

7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, ''Soon, soon....''

6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

5) Tell your roommate, ''I've got an important message for you.'' Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, ''Oh, yeah, I remember!'' Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, ''Hey, where the heck is my sandwich!?'' Complain loudly that you are hungry.

2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, ''Hooray! You're back!'' as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, ''Shouldn't you be going somewhere?''

1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, ''No, I want to watch them suffer.'''

Having a roomate at such a mature age (ha!) has led to a resurgance of practical jokes. Most of them have been me being the pranker and Carl being the prankee. I took a bath in the hall bathroom one night (his bathroom) and left my copy of "Twilight" in there. Later, finding it on the counter, started complaining about what if someone had found it in there, what would they think of him.How the book was for prepubescent little girls. So after he went to work that night, I left a copy of this on the back of the toilet.

Don't mess with a pro.

7 comments:

Mama Wheaton said...

I've never had a roommate(spouses don't count) but I think I willhave my daughter read these, she's off to college next year!

Claire said...

Okay, that was really funny! I think #8 was my favorite. I had a roommate briefly in college (suite mate is more accurate, I guess) and she was crazy and stole random things here and there (one fork, a few books)and subscribed to magazines in our names. Very creepy!

Pamibelle said...

The funny thing is my roomate would do all of these things but in a funny non-crazy way!

said...

These are pretty darn funny! I love the idea of leaving a snicker-worthy book mixed in with his stuff! It got me thinking of some pretty funny titles...

Michelle said...

So ok....that was a hoot! Bake the potato....that cracks me up.

Swinging by from SITS. Happy first day of Spring! Have a great day!

blognut said...

I think I can put a few of these to use around here. It'll totally throw my kids off balance. Wait, I've already done that for them. Oh well, it's worth a laugh.

Aubrey said...

Hysterical!
OMGosh! Makes me wish I had a roommate to mess with! LOL